Honestly, taking care of Addison is a lot of work. I feed her 8-10 times a day, and change at least as many diapers. I get up at 3 am to feed her. Sometimes after she eats, she decides it's playtime, so I sit in the dark and rock her and shhhh her, until she's sleepy enough to lay in her crib and fall back to sleep. Sometimes she spits up all over herself and me, creating lots of laundry. Sometimes she poops all over herself, and me, creating lots of laundry and bathtimes! My days are filled with decisions that books make you believe will make or break your child: Should I let her cry or pick her up? Am I holding her too much? Am I teaching her all she can learn? If I need to go somewhere, I have to arrange for someone to be here with her, or I strap her into her car seat and lug it in and out of the car on my errands. If she doesn't nurse well or when I'm working, I pump and give her bottles, which equals lots of little parts to wash (and an embarrasing situation or two). We have tummy time several times a day to help her learn to hold her head up, roll over and eventually sit up on her own. Though it doesn't feel like work, we help her develop her social skills by sitting and having conversations, and she smiles and laughs, though her best smiles are reserved for Daddy. I talk to her about the colors in front of us or the rain and thunder or that big brown puppy dog. Every now and then we have a doctor's appointment to go to or bloodwork to have drawn.
You see, at this point, the only thing special about Addison's needs is that they're hers. I know we'll have challenges and set backs along the way, but who doesn't? We've made it through the ones we've had so far, and we've come out better people on the other side. I think a lot of people think that because she has Down Syndrome, Addison will go through life ignorant or oblivious to what's going on around her. But I disagree. Behind her smile, I see a more intense enjoyment of life than that of some of the smartest people I know.
1 comment:
Oh Sweet Rach!! I can barely see the keys on the keyboard for the tears of joy in my eyes. What a beautiful way of "capturing in words" this unchartered territory we call motherhood. As you have seen in THE SPENCER HOUSEHOLD, the "unknown" is... will Courtney and Calvin have their Mommy there to watch them grow up? Only God knows the answer to that question; but you are 100% RIGHT...the trials that we go through only make us stronger and build character. They make us cherish each moment to the fullest and I personally feel so blessed that God trusted our family enough to embrace this trial and through it all GIVE HIM GLORY! I am so proud of you THREE! My prayer and faith is that God's plan IS for me to not only see Courtney and Calvin grow up, but to see Addison surpass milestone after milestone teaching others that a "doctor's diagnosis" is nothing more than INK ON PAPER! I LOVE YOU THREE FOREVER, JACQUELYN
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